I Could Never Marry John

from Ready, Set, Become... by Kevin Heider

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lyrics

If all the people in this world
Were suddenly all gone
And if you paid me a billion dollars
I still couldn't marry John

Well, he's alright for you, big sister
But it wouldn't work for me
The thought alone I find repulsive
And it's not so hard to see why

Oh, oh, I could never marry John
I could never marry John
I could never marry John
No offense

Well, he stares at himself in pictures
And tells me to look and see
He tells me that he's so good looking
But I'm inclined to disagree

He's alright for you, big sister
But it wouldn't work for me
The thought alone it makes me want to puke

Oh, oh, I could never marry John
I could never marry John
I could never marry John

Oh, oh, well, I don't mean to judge his character
But every relationship needs parameters
It's not that I don't think he qualifies
It's just that I'm not into other guys
And that's why…

I could never marry John
I could never marry John
He's tall and skinny like an alien
I could never marry John
No offense

credits

from Ready, Set, Become..., released May 1, 2011

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about

Kevin Heider Dayton, Ohio

Creator + host of the popular Song & Story podcast, Kevin Heider is a singer-songwriter from Dayton, Ohio.

Whether he's writing hymns or drinking songs, his music is imbued with an earnest social consciousness.

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